Just call me... the Drug Pimp

This may sound a bit sadistic, but I receive some sort of joy in telling some crack head that he cannot have his pain meds. It's not as if I look forward to it, I would much rather not tell someone who is mentally unstable that they cannot have what they want, but I take some perverse pleasure in it. A similar feeling occurs when I discover a prescription has been forged.

I have decided that I am a Drug Pimp and all the methadone-loving, oxycontin-craving, lortab-hoarding crack heads are my 'hos.

You want your Lortab filled 12 days early? BITCH SLAP! No, 'Ho!

You say you lost your bottle on your trip to Nigeria? BITCH SLAP! Don't lie to me 'Ho!

You want to pay cash for something you picked up three days ago? BITCH SLAP! Who you foolin' 'Ho?!

All I need is a purple hat with a feather in it. Just call me... the Drug Pimp.