Pull Your Head Out of your Ass

The last few days I've been reading up on the various pre-pharmacy/pharmacy support forums out there. I first stumbled upon them when looking for advice on the PCAT last fall and have been following them ever since. Rarely do I post at any of them as I just like to sift through them from time to time.

I decided to take a few days off from pumping out applications to get caught up on a few of the larger forums out there. After a while I realized I was rather disgusted with most of them. A lot of the individuals there are extremely conceited and full of themselves.

And I see a lot of you guys come to this blog, so I'll give you a little word of advice.

Pull your fucking head out of your damned ass.

You are not the greatest person in the world because you got a 98 on your PCAT. Just because you chose pharmacy as a career does not justify the fact you think you are better than everyone else. You're really no different than anyone else in the medical fields.

And don't talk down to someone with a lower GPA than yourself. Sure, you got a 4.0, but that doesn't mean you're smarter than the kid who got a 3.0. There are extenuating circumstances that prevents some from reaching their full potential in college. Many don't have mommy and daddy's money to fall back on when times are rough.

The cockiness needs to go as well. So you have your 98 PCAT score, your 4.0 GPA and you worked at Wal-Mart for a year as a tech or clerk. Whoopdy fuckin' do. I'll give you a little word of advice, you don't learn shit at a place like Wal-Mart. Anyone that has ever transferred to our stores from Wal-Mart could count and that was really about it.

Granted the Tier 2 techs are slightly better, but you still don't know shit. You may be certified, but that test is a fucking joke today anyways (future post coming on that) and it really doesn't mean anything now. A drunk monkey with one eye could pass the exam.

For some reason these people seem to be mainly located in the California region of the country. Damn good thing I'm not applying to any school in that state.

Am I being cruel? No, I'm not. Leave your egos at the door. Stop talking as if you're Superman. Act human for Christ's sake. Is that too much to ask?

Pharmacy App Essays are a Joke

I have grown quite weary of writing the last few weeks. I swear the pharmacy schools across the nation are trying to overwhelm applicants with various redundant application questions.

Some want an essay in 1000 words. Some in 1000 characters. Some in 1000 characters with spaces. Some in three pages (whatever the fuck that means as there is no formatting requirements). Rain Man couldn't even keep track of all this shit.

And the questions are so abstract at times its unreal. Or they'll ask you a question that requires a detailed answer, but they want you to keep it under 300 words.

The best part is the same questions appear on the various apps, but they're all just different enough that you have to write a new one.

I was writing a slew of them at about 2am the other night when I realized that I that first I had combined two questions in one answer and then in another I had typed 1700 words when they wanted 1700 characters.

Oops.

Thank God I'm almost done with these... they're really starting to tap out what's left of my sanity.

What's with the Hydrocodone Love Lately?

All of the robots in this company are stocked full of the three most common hydrocodone/APAP strengths, 5/500, 7.5/500, and 10/500. Occasionally you'll see a script for Vicodin ES, but it is mainly those three strengths.

Until recently that is.

Six months ago we started having to add the 10/325mg strength to the robots. It wasn't that uncommon to see someone switch from #240 of 10/500mg to #360 of 10/325mg. On some days, the 10/325mg flavor was the most used.

Weird.

Now we've had a rush of scrips for the 5/325mg flavor in the past month. Some docs have exclusively switched from 5/500mg to 5/325mg. We were debating on Thursday whether or not we need to start adding this to the robots as well.

Yesterday someone handed me the first script for 7.5/325mg that I have seen in five years.

What in the hell is going on? What is with the massive change in the past year? I mean I see why they could be going that route as they were previously limited to eight tablets a day so their liver didn't explode. Now they can enjoy upwards of 120mg of hydrocodone daily.

Where is the logic in this? The people who are bringing these in are those who are on narc contracts or are known abusers. Isn't this just catering to their problem?

Is this happening anywhere else or is isolated to the small area here? Is there some therapeutic benefit that we're not aware of or have I figured out the method to this madness? I hope to God I'm wrong because, if so, I'll have even less faith in prescribers than I do already.

The Montgomery Scott Method

I'll let you in on a little secret that I employ to make myself look even more fantastic than I actually am. It's a trick I learned many years ago and I use it on an almost daily basis.

I call it the Montgomery Scott Method.

Us nerds know that Montgomery Scott, better known as Scotty, was nicknamed the Miracle Worker on Star Trek. During a cameo on Star Trek: TNG, he explained to someone else how he earned that moniker. His explanation?

If someone asks you do to something, and asks them how long it takes, you never tell them how long it'll really take. If it takes 2 hours say it'll take 3 hours. That way when you get done early, everyone is impressed. If it takes you longer than you thought, you have that extra hour to work with. In either case you'll be looked at as a Miracle Worker.

That really sums it up. When people bring in an Rx and say they're gonna wait and ask how long it'll take I'll tell them 15-20 minutes even though I know it'll take less than five. That way when I bring them their fresh Rx after five minutes they are impressed with how quickly I was able to complete it for them.

I've also used this on projects many many times. One of my old managers thought I was practically a god for how 'quickly' I could get things done.

Is it dishonest? In a small way, yes, but I see no harm in it. Just a little self promotion right?

It's Time for Change

A new day is dawning in the day of pharmacy...

My cousin and I were chatting a few weeks back and I mentioned I was due to renew my certification for another two years. She quipped back 'What, do you're a Certified Pharmacy Bitch?"

I've been thinking about it and, ya know what, we should have Certified Pharmacy Bitches.

As of today I am sketching out the requirements needed for such certification, but I am more than open to suggestions from the readers of this blog. I figured it can be associated 'unofficially' with the APhA (because that makes me giggle so hard my I pee a little) and I even have the certificate in the works.
As you can see we'll also need a Board of Directors and someone to chair it. Thinking of seeing of TAestP would be interested in lending his name to this new cause.

Either put your thoughts in this post or feel free to email me.

The Batman Has Returned

Man it's been a long time since I've done any crime fighting and I completely forgot how enjoyable it can be.

So I'm filling in at a store for the day, a store I typically do not work at, and thus far it has been rather uneventful. I decide to take a minute to go replenish my empty Mountain Dew bottle when I see a gentleman sitting in chairs.

He looks familiar, but I can't place him. God that pisses me off when that happens. I ask the clerk if he's waiting, she replies yes, so I go to check the name to satisfy my own curiosity.

I look at the name and it dawns on me on who it is.

Now for a little back history;

A few weeks back we had a script set up for delivery go missing. For whatever reason our clerk had left them on the edge of the counter and went about with the rest of her work. Of course it would have to be a hydrocodone/apap script. At about the same time a guy and his wife show up to pick up some prescription. Noticing the delivery and its location he and his wife devise a fairly sophisticated system to grab the prescription.

Gotta hand it to them, this was one of the most sophisticated, and ballsy, maneuver that I have seen yet. This was in front of other customers and everyone in the pharmacy. Thank God I wasn't working that day.

Anywho we figured out what happened, watched the video and had been working for a week to put together a case against him.

Low and behold the same dude, with his wife, was sitting in chairs. When I looked at the scripts I realized that they were for him, but with a different name and birthday. For hydrocodone and diazepam. And he wanted to pay cash.

Jackpot.

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, Batman!


I exit the pharmacy immediately so he doesn't recognize me as he is a regular at my main store.

I quickly call my manager to let her know of the situation and she is flabbergasted that he would even attempt such a thing after what he did previously. Now we have to figure out if we can confirm that it is actually the same person. I'm only 95% sure it's him, but I don't want to get an innocent man arrested.

So I tell our pharmacist to pull out the HIPPA forms and ask him to see an ID. I watch the pharmacist talk to him over the security cameras, but then the guy and his wife exit the store The RPh comes back and says that he didn't have one on him.

Rats, plan foiled. Or is it?

A few minutes later he strolls back in the store with an ID. An ID with his REAL name on it.

What a fucking dumbass.

I spring in to motion calling 911 and give them the details of the situation. They state they'll send some officers to our location immediately.

Wicked.

Then I notice, for whatever reason, they are letting him leave after paying for the scripts. I grab two co-workers and tell them to go outside by the parking lot and get info on the vehicle they get into. As he leaves, they come back in and tell me what they saw.

I call dispatch back and update them. As I'm relaying all the details the dispatcher goes "And..... we got them, thanks." and then hangs up.

Turns out the guy took about thirty hydrocodone 10/500mg and 20 diazepam 10mg as he was being pulled over. Naturally he OD'd, but they managed to empty his stomach upon arrival at the local hopsital.

He had a few other warrants out as well, so upon being released from the hospital he was tossed in the clink. At least we can find him when we finish our case against him now.

I decided to go to the urgent care, which is just down the road from us, where he had gotten the Rxs to talk to the doc. I wanted to know if there were any other scripts floating out there because this guy obviously had cojones of epic proportion.

When I explained to him the situation he was shocked. Apparently he came in with a neck brace and, what appeared to be, spasms. Then, naturally, he became very pissed off and flagged the hell out of his profile(s) in their system.

The next day we found out that he had pulled the same thing at two other Urgent Cares and had them called into two other pharmacies.

But I foiled his evil plan muhahahahahahhaha.

Seriously what bad luck does this son of a bitch have to come into a store where I just happen to be working. If I hadn't been there, no one would know who he was. That makes me giggle even more.

To top it off, he is the 20th person I have sent to jail in my five year tenure here. I feel like I should get a cake or a gold watch or something.

And they say pharmacy is boring at times...