Tuesday, May 31, 2011

The Battle of the PPIs

The remains of the fallen solders from the Prevacid tribe

In the annals of historic battles there are Gettysburg and D-Day, but never before has there been a battle as epic, or as dramatic, as the Battle of the Proton Pump Inhibitors this past evening.

On one side sat the old guard, the Tribe of Prilosec led by General Astra Zenica. As one of the oldest tribes in the PPI realm, Prilosec had felt the increasing pressure of the Prevacid Tribe as they first encroached on the Prescription Peninsula and then eventually OTC Island. Using shimmery, metallic purple colors they attempted to outshine Prevacid Tribe, but in recent months had continued to be besieged by the upstart tribe. Now they felt their livelyhood was immediately threatened by its racemic counterpart.

Prevacid Tribe, led by the venerable General Takeda, had surpassed all expectations and supplanted themselves as a force on PPI isle. A more multi-racial tribe composed of equally mixed pinks and aquas, Prevacidians found themselves ambitious and eager as they attempted to topple the mighty Tribe of Prilosec.

At 7:04 PM on Tuesday the 31st of May, the General Zenica gave the order which would alter the history of the PPI isle. A surprise attack on the capital of Prevacid Tribe, Novartis, sought to finally rid the world of the too-similar Prevacidians.

Using intimate pharmacologic knowledge, Prilosec leaders used optical attacks from the left and right to decimate the Tribe of Prilosec. Capsule and capsule parts lie strewn across the land, with the innards of Prevacidians coating the counter-side.

By the end of the battle, the Tribe of Prilosec stood victorious over their nemesis, and found themselves the reaffirmed King of PPIs... for now.

3 comments:

PA Honeybee said...

I loved this post so shared with a few colleagues and this is what one of them said:
Yes, but if they entered the Domain of Cerebral Infarct, where The Earl of Plavix rules supreme, the Prilosec Tribe would have been humbled by the Edict of the FDA, which condemns the dubious conduct of the elder PPI clan With the sensitive Plavixians.

I thought I'd share.

Misch said...

Simply awesome.

shekhar said...

very nice blog